One year plan

I often ponder the idea of taking one year off

I approach 40 - - I cannot predict in any way my future or fate in life. Should I die tomorrow this would be one of my greatest regrets to not focus enough time to try and find myself.

I realize though with almost certainty that after one year off I will realize I am nowhere further in finding myself.... The question is whether the journey is needed or not.

I can continue on - spending 22 days a year on holidays and getting by at work... Making good  money saving for a house and etc... The question is opportunity cost vs time. One year off is like - 100k minimum to the bottom line. Lost wages and cash burn.... What to do.

I must meditate.....